ADHD Heart Is the Best Decision Maker: How I Always Know What I Want (In Comics)
And I want it now. On repeat, please!
ADHD CHRONICLES
And I want it now. On repeat, please!
I have always seen the world very black and white: I either love something or I hate it! You can imagine my surprise when I heard other people saying things like “I’m ok with this, but I don’t really know what I want anyway”. This made me realize that my ability to always know what I want is not typical. Only years later I found out why. I have an ADHD heart.
What is an ADHD heart, you might ask? “ADHD heart” is what I call a decision-making process entirely based on following what feels right. And also, because I have ADHD (Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder). The following comic illustrates what I mean.
❤How I always know what I want
Having ADHD means seeking extra stimulation in everything to power our dopamine-hungry brains. This leads to two possibilities. We either find it, in which case we looove the thing that stimulates us, or we don’t find it, in which case we hate the thing that doesn’t cut it for us. Summary:
More stimulation=I love it.
Less or no stimulation=I dislike/hate it.
Having ADHD also means I simply cannot do what I dislike on any level (even for a high reward). So, I am left with a single option: Following what I love every step of the way. Take decisions like getting married, moving to the other side of the world (almost exactly for Berlin-Melbourne), taking a new job, or changing professional areas…easy peasy! Let’s do it. If it feels right, that’s the way to go. (If this comes across as bragging, read my other comics where I struggle with basic everyday tasks that a child could do.)
❤ADHD heart=ADHD brain🧠
I often hear these stories of people who had bad experiences in love, got disappointed, and are unable to love again because they are shielding themselves from further pain. As an ADHDer, I cannot say I understand the concept of shielding yourself from emotions. Now, I don’t know if this is strictly an ADHD thing but emotions are how I process the world and everything that happens to me. My ADHD brain is my ADHD heart. (In fact, we know that this is scientifically the case, the heart is just a blood-pumping organ and the brain is where emotions happen. Ups, I hope my title wasn’t misleading.)
We often hear this idea that emotions are irrational and bad, and that we should base all our decisions on logical thinking instead of feelings. Logical thinking might do wonders if you are calculating a statistical correlation between the prevalence of ADHD and emotional dysregulation in the general population, but it might not help with deciding whether that is something you would like to do in a job your entire career.
My point is you need to know what you like, not what sounds good on paper. Due to my black-and-white thinking and feeling all the feels so strongly, my ADHD allows me to see oh so clearly what I like and what I dislike. Somewhat paradoxically, what is sometimes the source of my emotional dysregulation can also be the source of the ultimate emotional superpower allowing me to see deep into myself.
❤And I want it now. On repeat, please!
ADHDers are famous for not being persistent and easily losing interest after the initial excitement. What is less known, however, is that ADHDers can also develop long-lasting obsessions when they really love something. Unfortunately for many of us, these obsessions are not necessarily productive…but they can be (let’s not lose hope).
Like a child who can watch the same show countless times, I do not get tired of watching my favorite movies or listening to the songs I like over and over again. The adults and neurotypicals living with us scream in despair. (But just to be clear, I watch LOTR only every few months). Fortunately for me, I also have some slightly more productive obsessions, for example, creating comics about my obsessions or getting excited about scientific research about my obsessions (I feel like there is a pattern here).
What are your obsessions? Let me know in the comments!
❤The end
If you want to see my art and comics as I make them, sign up for my newsletter Ana’s Comics (no account needed to sign up) and follow my comics on Tapas, or Instagram!
If you decide to become a Medium member, you can use this referral link and a portion of your membership fee will support me directly. Thank you!
And if you are interested in ADHD, check out my other articles about it:
Living With Adult ADHD: Explained In Comics
Chasing a life where everything is exciting and nothing is boringmedium.com
Owning ADHD and Coping With It: In Comics
I rarely read books, but when I do, it’s because I want to write one.medium.com
Why Everything Takes Longer When You Have ADHD (In Comics)
Welcome to the world where “crying over spilled milk” is interpreted literally and having fun is the only solutionmedium.com
Living With Adult ADHD Is Spooky: Explained in Comics
Muahahaha — 4 spooky things that might happen to ADHDers and other innocent souls this Halloweenmedium.com
ADHD Xmas In Comics
How to embrace being ADHD during Xmasmedium.com
A Guide to Being a Happy Pessimist In 2023
New Year’s tips in comicsmedium.com